The Eyes of a Child
by Falcons-Tears
Summary: Angel rescues some children from Wolfram & Heart and all seems well. But why does one blonde boy with pale blue eyes look familiar? And when the truth suddenly comes out, Angel has to face some interesting truths about a certain lawyer SLASH Lindsey/Angel, MPreg
1. Chapter 1

**A/N: **Okay, this has been going around my head for a while and I finally tried to type it down. It was really hard, but I needed to get the plot bunny out of my head. And maybe you like the idea a little and reviews would of course be most appreciated *smiles* I might rewrite the first chapter in a few days to get it to flow better, but I needed to get it out of my system, because it wouldn't leave me alone and wouldn't let me continue my other stories... so yeah... I really hope it wasn't too bad *smiles sheepishly* and the next chapters will be longer than the first one... *smiles*

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Oh and by the way: This is my first Angel (well, at least purely Angel and not a crossover) story and I haven't seen all Angel seasons, only the ones with Lindsey in it *sheepish smile*, so I hope I didn't mess up the time line too much, even though it will go a little AU anyway, because Lindsey's whole history with Wolfram & Hart will be a little different, as will Lindsey's past.

So yeah, I really hope you enjoy the first chapter and it isn't too bad of a beginning and please keep in mind, that English isn't my native language *sigh*

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**Warnings: AU, SLASH** (Lindsey/?, Lindsey/Angel somewhere along the way)

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**Disclaimer:** The characters from Angel belong to Joss Whedon and I'm just borrowing them for my little story. This is not for money, but just for fun...

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**Summary:** Angel and the gang rescue some children from the clutches of Wolfram and Heart and all seems well. But why does one blonde boy with pale blue eyes look so awfully familiar? And when the truth suddenly comes out, Angel has to face some interesting truths about one irritating, sexy lawyer...

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><p><strong>The Eyes of a Child<strong>

**Chapter 1**

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><p>.<p>

"Angel, we should hurry, the guards are coming our way."

Charles Gunn, only Gunn to most of his friends, twirled the silver dagger in his hand and gripped it tighter, before casting a look over his shoulder down the thankfully still empty hallway, even though they could hear footsteps coming closer.

Angel turned his head and glared at Gunn. The other had been a little annoying the whole time they had been here in the lone house where Cordelia's vision had let them. Obviously Wolfram & Hart kept some children captive here to blackmail their parents. And Angel of course couldn't let that happen, so Gunn, Wesley and he had come here to get the children out. Wesley had, with the help of a few well placed spells, hidden them from view. But obviously that didn't work anymore for some reason and Angel just hoped that Wesley was okay.

"If you want to kick in the door, then be my guest," he hissed, finally giving up trying to pick the lock and taking a few steps back, running at the door and then kicking it down. The vampire hadn't wanted to do that, because he hadn't wanted to alert the guards. But obviously the guards Wolfram & Hart had positioned here had noticed them anyway, so caution wasn't necessary anymore.

The wood of the door splintered and then the door gave away under the vampire's powerful kick and Gunn and Angel quickly entered the room, both not sure what they would find and so they were prepared for the worst.

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"Well, at least they didn't hurt them," Angel murmured in relief and looked around the surprisingly spacious room filled with children toys, books and three comfortable looking beds. Sitting in those beds were three children, two girls and one boy. They were looking at the vampire and Gunn with wide eyes and the two girls were out of their bed and huddled close to the boy with the light brown, almost blonde hair, about six years old. And the boy quickly put his arms around the girls, who seemed younger than him. Then he finally looked at Angel, blinking his eyes and Angel was a little startled how blue the boy's eyes were.

"Who are you?" the kid questioned, trying to sound threatening, but Angel detected the boy's rapid heartbeat and could even smell the boy's fear. He tried to look as friendly as possible.

"We're here to free you and bring you back to your parents," he explained, keeping his voice as soft as possible, before he took a cautious step closer to the kids. It made the girls whimper in fear and cuddle even closer to the little boy, who was barely older than them, but he seemed to be their protector.

Angel couldn't help but smile at that little display and crouched down to be on eye-level with the kids. Again it was the boy, who spoke up, the blue eyes studying the vampire carefully.

"You're not from Wolfram & Hart?" he asked and Angel shook his head, ignoring Gunn's growls to hurry up. He knew he needed to get the kids to trust him, or they would not come with him.

"No, my name is Angel, and as I said, I'm here to get you back to your parents. But you need to come with me..."

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Angel didn't need to say more, because the little boy's shoulder's straightened as soon as he had heard Angel say his name and he nudged both girls.

"Sarah, Lynn, we can trust him. He's Angel, the guy my dad told us about," he said and the girls nodded, finally looking at Angel, smiling tiny smiles and Angel was a little relieved. This was going better than he had hoped.

A loud screech from the doorway and Gunn's battle cry, if you wanted to call it that, made Angel sigh.

_/Maybe not as well as I had hoped./_ he mused, whirling around and blocking the man that had been about to attack him, throwing the man, surprisingly a human, against the opposite wall. He looked at Gunn and saw that he needed his help.

So the master vampire just turned his head and yelled at the children: "Keep staying out of the way and try to get out the door as soon as you can."

He could smell that the three were scared, but once again it was the little boy, who nodded and who grabbed the girls' hands, gently pulling them out of the bed, only seconds before Angel threw one of the guards that had charged him, down on it, shattering the frame.

"Go!" he called, relieved when the children obeyed and tried to get to the door. He followed the children, especially the little boy, who looked so awfully familiar, just a few seconds too long and another guard took his chance, tackling the vampire to the ground. Angel growled and grabbed the man's arm, trying to twist it, before a well placed punch to the head knocked the man out. It was just in time to hear the girls scream in fear and then he had heard a deep male voice, but definitely not human: "Don't let them escape, especially the boy! I don't care about the girls, but don't let the boy go."

Angel frowned a little, wondering what was so special about that little boy with the startling blue eyes, they were a blue that Angel had only seen once before... eyes that hunted him in the few dreams he had... and not all of them were nightmares.

But the vampire quickly pushed those thoughts aside and whirled around to see what was going on. He found Gunn fighting three men at once. A huge, green being stood in the doorway, looking at the three children, who were huddled together, pressed against the wall, shrinking away from two other men, who were trying to grab them.

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Angel roared and his vampire face was out in a second, before he charged the men, keeping them away from the children. It didn't really take him and Gunn long to take out the guards and Angel finally faced the green-skinned demon, who had been leaning in the doorway almost casually, preventing from anyone exiting the room.

"So, the master vampire with a soul is going to kidnap three children?" the demon asked, a chuckle heard in his voice. Angel only growled and stepped between the children and the demon. Gunn came to stand beside him, the dagger in his arm, bleeding from a small wound in his shoulder, but it wasn't anything too serious, so Angel decided not to worry about it for now.

"Kidnap them? You're holding them hostage here to blackmail their parents into working for you," Angel stated, his hands clenched into fists, ready to attack the last barrier between here and the children's freedom. The demon, however, only laughed, a loud rumbling laugh, which made the girls sob in fear and even the boy whimpered. And Angel guessed that the demon had visited the children occasionally, frightening them.

"You can have the girls, their parents are useless for the firm now anyway, but the boy... no... the Senior Partners won't like it if I let the boy go. This would be my death sentence, so why don't we make a deal? I let you and your friend go with the girls and the boy stays here?" the demon asked and Angel growled in anger.

"I'm leaving with all the children and you're either let us go and try your luck with the Senior Partners, or I can kill you right here and now," he explained, motioning to Gunn, who understood and walked to the children, trying to calm them down a little, even though he wasn't too good with kids. But the boy looked so lost and frightened, maybe he feared that Angel might take the deal and leave him here...

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Again, the demon only laughed, taking a step closer to Angel, who tensed even more, ready to attack as soon as the demon came to close.  
>"Don't underestimate me, vampire. If you kill me, you'll wake something far more dangerous that is guarding the house and nobody of you will leave here alive. It will kill you, your friend and those sweet children over there. And maybe we can negotiate again, when you have one last piece of information... I mean, if I were you, I might want to know who the father of the boy actually is," he said, his voice going even deeper, more than a growl now and Angel recognized it as a sing of danger. But the vampire had stared down many other opponents, much more threatening than that guard-demon, so he only shook his head, but somehow his interest was piqued and he really wanted to find out who the father is. The boy looked so familiar and even though a part of his brain had a pretty good idea why, the rest of said brain refused to believe it. But Angel sure as hell didn't want the demon to know that he was indeed curious.<p>

"I don't care who the boy's father is. I'm going to take these children back to their families," he snarled and then, as fast as he possibly could, he tried to punch the demon, but to Angel's surprise the demon managed to get out of the way quite easily. The souled vampire realized that this opponent was stronger than he had thought

"Nice try, vampire," he said, still calm and even a little amused. Angel hissed, his game face back in play and he was about to charge the demon again, when the monster's next words made him stop in his tracks, because they stunned him beyond belief...

"And no matter if you want to hear it or not, I'm going to tell you anyway. This little boy over there is so valuable for Wolfram & Hart, because he is Lindsey McDonald's son."

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to be continued, if you're interested...

So, was it good? Was it bad? Comments would be most appreciated *smiles*


	2. Chapter 2

**A/N:** Hey everybody, here comes a new chapter and I'm awfully sorry that it took me so long *smiles apologetically* And I'm really happy that so many of you liked the first chapter. I really hope you will like the second chapter too and reviews would of course be most appreciated *puppy dog eyes*

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Thank you so much to **whovian42** (yeah, I know my commas are funky sometimes... I just hope it doesn't get too bad *sigh*),** SlytherinQueen020, Jesco123, msdarque, CanAnyoneHearMe** (wow, thank you for that long review and I really hope I'll continue this story to your satisfaction *smiles*), **McCoy's Secret Lover, fro-chan, Harm Marie, Elura The Strange, TerrorInYerBathtub and darkshadowarchfiend **for all your kind reviews *hugs you all* They really mean so much to me *happy smile*

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**Please keep in mind that English is not my native language...**

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**Warnings: AU, SLASH** (Lindsey/?, Lindsey/Angel somewhere along the way)

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**Disclaimer:** The characters from Angel belong to Joss Whedon and I'm just borrowing them for my little story. This is not for money, but just for fun...

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><p><strong>Chapter 2<strong>

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><p>.<p>

"This little boy over there is so valuable for Wolfram & Hart, because he is Lindsey McDonald's son."

Angel stared at the demon and shook his head in denial. No, he really didn't want to believe that that boy was Lindsey McDonald's son. But one look at the impossibly pale blue eyes, which were now wide with fear, also made it impossible to deny the truth. To be honest, Angel had known from the first moment he had got his first good look at the boy.

Angel shook his head once again. He could worry about that latter. No matter if the boy was Lindsey's son or not, he was an innocent child and needed to be rescued. And the souled vampire needed to focus on how to get the children, Gunn and himself out of the house before Wolfram & Hart sent reinforcements.

He took one long look at Gunn, who just nodded, clearly understanding that Angel was going to attack the demon and distract him and Gunn was to finish him off.

The demon stood in the doorway again, blocking their only exit.

"So, are you still not interested in our little bargain, Angel?" he asked, a smug look on his face and a dangerous glint in his eyes.

"Dream on, freak. I may hate his father but the boy has done nothing wrong and doesn't deserve to be held prisoner here," he snarled and charged at the demon, deliberately moving so that the demon now had his back to the children and to Gunn.

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The demon only blocked Angel's attack with ease and chuckled.

"I thought you could do better, master vampire." The demon sounded almost disappointed, but suddenly his facial expression changed and his eyes widened in shock, before he screamed in pain.

Then he toppled forward and Angel had barely time to get out of the way or he'd be buried under the corpse of the demon, who had the silver dagger buried deep in his back. Gunn was standing behind him, his hands still wrapped around the hilt, a victory grin on his face.

Angel gave him an approving smile, when suddenly the ground shook and it sounded like a roar coming from deep within the walls of the house. The three children were huddled close together and whimpered in fear.

"What the hell was that?" Gunn questioned, trying to hide his unease from the children. Angel turned his head and his superior vampire hearing picked up a faint rumble, which got louder with every passing second.

"I fear that this is the backup the demon has talked about," he muttered and then walked over to the children, crouching down to be on eye-level with them.

"Don't worry, we will get you out of here and back to your families," he soothed and picked up the boy, who struggled a little at first and one of the girls and Gunn picked up the second girl. They were just out of the room when the ground shook again, nearly causing Angel to fall with the two children keeping him slightly off balance. Only his good reflexes saved him. That gave Gunn the chance to catch up with the vampire.

"I guess we better hurry, because whatever it is, I really don't want to be here when it's fully awake," he stated and Angel just nodded.

Wit the three children clinging to them the two ran like hell..

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They had just made it out of the house when there was another roar and then the house suddenly exploded into flames. Angel and Gunn had barely managed to duck behind the car where Wesley was sitting behind the wheel and waiting for them.

"What the hell was that?"

Gunn stared at Angel, but the master vampire just shrugged.

"I've no idea and I don't what to stay around to find out if there are any more surprises," he said, before looking at the three children.

"Are you okay?" he asked softly. The three kids only nodded, still too frightened to speak. Angel gave them a reassuring smile.

"Good. Then let's go and reunite you with your parents," he said, mostly looking at the boy, whose name he still didn't know.

The boy avoided looking at Angel now and the vampire wondered why. Earlier he had been so brave, open and trusting and had looked Angel straight in the eyes, probably to find out if the vampire was really there to help them. And now... now he barely raised his head. He just followed Angel's instructions and climbed into the back of the car, careful to keep his distance from the vampire, who squeezed in the back with the three children while Gunn took the passenger seat. It was a tight fit, but with Sara and Lynn cuddling as close as possible to the blue-eyed boy, both girls falling asleep within seconds, there was enough space for the drive back to the Hyperion.

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"What happened?" Wesley questioned while he started the car, driving away as fast as possible.

"Apparently Wolfram & Hart's security was a little better than we thought," Gunn explained, keeping his voice low so that he wouldn't wake the children. Wesley just nodded and Angel leaned a little forward.  
>"Let's just go back to the hotel and hope that Lorne and Cordelia have found the families of the kids, so that they can reunite and then we can get them out of the city," he explained, rubbing his neck for a second. Wesley nodded and sped the car up even more.<p>

None of them noticed the dark, winged figure following them, using the shadows of the night as disguise. It had been on their trail ever since they had started driving away from the burning house. It had an evil glint in his eyes and kept the car's pace with ease, but following at a safe distance. It didn't have to worry about losing sight of the car, because it could always scent the boy, no matter where he went...

So it was more than obvious that the now dead demon hadn't lied. There had been something dangerous slumbering deep within the house... something much more dangerous and it had only one purpose, Wolfram & Hart had gone to great length to ensure that it fulfilled exactly that purpose.

And Angel was leading it straight towards their headquarters without even knowing...

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><p>.<p>

About half an hour later Angel watched the children sitting on the couch, still clinging to each other. And the vampire didn't really blame them. They had been imprisoned together for who knew how long and so it was only natural for them to gravitate towards each other in foreign surroundings.

Lorne was standing beside him, also watching the three kids.

"The parents of the girls are with Cordelia and Wesley right now. They instruct them how to get out of the city and where to go," the demon explained, scratching his chin with one hand, the other in the pocket of his, as usual, colorful suit.

"We unfortunately weren't able to locate the boy's father," Lorne then added and there was an undertone in his voice that Angel couldn't quite place, but he strongly thought that he had also seen the resemblance between Lindsey and the boy. Angel sighed a little and ran a hand through his hair. The boy still hadn't said a word ever since they had left the house and whenever Angel came too close to him, he flinched away. The vampire had to admit that he was a bit confused and somehow even hurt by the boy's behavior.

"I know who the boy's father is and you do too, Lorne, don't you?" Angel questioned, his eyes never leaving the boy. Lorne nodded.

"Yeah I know," he admitted and turned towards Angel.  
>"The question is, what are we going to do about it? Or better yet, what are you going to do with that knowledge?" the demon asked and again there was an undertone in his voice that made Angel a little uneasy.<p>

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>"What do you mean?" he questioned, trying to play dumb. Lorne gave Angel one of his "I know you better than you know yourself" looks that made even Angel feel small and insecure, not that the vampire would ever admit that out loud.<p>

"Come on, Angel. I know you well enough to know that you're dying to ask a certain lawyer a lot of questions," Lorne explained. Angel snorted.

"Damn right I want to ask him a few questions," the vampire said and he wanted to say more when suddenly the boy's whole face light up into a bright smile and he jumped from the couch and yelled "daddy", running past Angel and Lorne towards the lobby.

The demon and the vampire turned in surprise, just in time to see the boy leap into the arms of none other than Wolfram & Hart's golden boy Lindsey McDonald.

And Angel couldn't help the small smile on his face when he saw the happy reunion between father and son. Now there was no mistaking anymore, the boy looked like a mini-Lindsey, just his hair was a bit darker than his father's.

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Angel quickly turned his face expressionless again, before he walked over to where Lindsey stood, his son held close against his chest, his face buried in the boy's hair.

"So you've heard about it?" he questioned, trying to keep his voice neutral. Lindsey looked up and Angel was a little shocked to see tears in the younger man's eyes, well compared to Angel, he was not more than a boy. But Lindsey ignored the tears and just nodded.

His voice was so soft that Angel barely heard him, when he whispered a "thank you". And Angel was taken aback a little, because Lindsey McDonald had never thanked him, at least not voluntarily.

He tried to shrug off the strange feeling that was growing in his stomach when he watched father and son.

"Don't think I've done this for you," he said, his voice harsher than he had intended. But Lindsey didn't seem surprised by his harsh tone.

"I don't think so, that's why I took care that Cordelia would get that particular vision," the lawyer stated, keeping his tone neutral too.

Angel stared at the younger man.

"Wait what? You sent Cordy the vision?" he questioned, disbelief coloring his voice and Lindsey nodded.  
>"Yeah I did, I knew you'd never believe me, let alone help me if I'd come to you asking for it." There was a sadness in his eyes that Angel had never seen before from the other man.<p>

"I mean, you were so stubborn and only wanted to believe that I'm evil. You didn't even listen last time I tried to talk to you about my reasons working for Wolfram & Hart. I wanted to change but you didn't give me the chance. And then I couldn't, because they took Eliot," Lindsey explained and Angel couldn't help to feel guilty. Yeah, Lindsey had tried to change, but Angel had been too stubborn and too set on pushing the young man and the ambiguous feelings for him away so that he wouldn't have to deal with them.

"Lindsey, I..." he started, but Lindsey just held his hand up.

"Don't bother Angel. I'll leave town now, because I can't go back to Wolfram & Hart and I can't stay here. Thank you for rescuing my son and now we'll be out of your way," he explained.

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Lorne, who hadn't said a word before now walked up to them and said: "Nonsense, you can't leave tonight. You can stay with me for a few days and then Angel will help you find a way out of the city, won't you Angel."

Lindsey was truly touched by Lorne's offer and the surprised, almost stupid look on Angel's face made him laugh a little, but again he shook his head.

"I can take care of myself and of Eliot. I have done so for years," he explained and then looked at Angel when he said the next part: "And I really don't want to stay somewhere where I'm not wanted."

With that he turned around and was about to walk out of the building when suddenly the boy, Eliot as Angel now knew, squirmed and freed himself from his father's hold, jumped to his feet and ran over to Angel.

The vampire looked at the boy in surprise, especially when Eliot asked, his voice innocent, sad and angry at the same time: "Why do you hate my dad? When all he ever did was love you?"

The answer had shocked Angel into a stunned silence and before he could recover, a shattering roar broke it, windows smashed and Lindsey screamed... a scream so full of pain that Angel's heart clenched painfully and with a roar he charged at the winged demon that had sunk its claws deep into Lindsey's back... hoping that he wasn't too late to safe Lindsey...

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to be continued...

Well yeah, here it is, the second chapter... I really hope it wasn't too bad...

Comments would be most appreciated *smiles hopefully*

And as for the name for Lindsey's son... I just couldn't resist *sheepish grin*


	3. Chapter 3

**A/N:** Hey everybody, here comes a new chapter and I really, really hope you will like it, because, just like with my other stories, I feel kind of out of rhythm with writing this, so I hope it's not too awkward *sheepish smile* I'm also considering to make a cover for this story, even though I've no idea how to do it and if I do it'll probably look like crap... I'm just not good with graphic programs, but I'd really like to have a cover for my stories... *sigh* so I'll try and come up with something that looks at least okay...

Reviews are, of course and as always, most appreciated, because I love to hear what you think about my story *puppy dog eyes*

**And also I have an important question for you, which goes for most of my stories (especially this one, the Leverage/Angel crossover and my Leverage story In the Darkness):** Since ff . net doesn't allow too explicit scenes, I was thinking about creating an account at archiveofourown, so that I can post the chapters with the explicit scenes (even though I'm not sure how explicit I will be, but I'd like to have the option), over there and post them without the explicit stuff over here, so you can all read the version you'd like. So, the question is, do you think that it's a good idea? I'd really like your opinion on it, since I'm not sure...

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Of course thank you to **darkshadowarchfiend, Jesco123, msdarque, McCoy's Secret Lover, SlytherinQueen020, fro-chan, dr3, JohnneyAntonelli and Elura The Strange** for all your kind comments *hugs you all* Your words mean so much to me and always make me smile with happiness...

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**Warnings: AU, SLASH** (Lindsey/?, Lindsey/Angel somewhere along the way)

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**Disclaimer:** The characters from Angel belong to Joss Whedon and I'm just borrowing them for my little story. This is not for money, but just for fun...

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><p><strong>Chapter 3<strong>

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><p>.<p>

"Do you think he's waking up?"

"Yeah, it looks like it."

Two voices filtered through Lindsey's brain when he slowly started to wake up from what felt like a heavy sleep. The sudden wave of pain that washed through him, however, made it impossible for the young man to put names to the voices, because the pain almost made him black out again. Everything was hazy and he couldn't stop the groan of pain escaping him. Why on Earth did he feel like he'd been stabbed into the back with something really, really sharp?

Lindsey tried to blend out the pain and focus his mind. He almost frantically searched his mind for the last thing he could remember and that might give him an idea why he felt like crap and why his subconsciousness urged him to jump out of whatever bed he was lying in and run.

Suddenly it all came rushing back to him... Angel... the demon... Eliot...

"Eliot!" he screamed, or better wanted to scream, but it was merely a hoarse whisper that emerged from his dry throat.

"Daddy!" his son answered immediately and unbearable relief spread through Lindsey and helped ease the pain he was in a little. At least his son was alright, no matter what had happened.

Two thin arms carefully wrapped around him and that gave Lindsey the strength to finally open his eyes. He blinked a few times, so that his eyes could adjust to the light again.

When he could finally see again, the picture that greeted him was entirely unexpected, totally disturbing and also a little cute.

Because he didn't just see his son sitting by his bedside, no, he also saw Angel, who held Eliot in his lap, arms secure around the young boy's waist, so that he could lean over to the bed and hug Lindsey. And what surprised Lindsey even more, was that Eliot didn't seem to mind to sit in Angel's lap, quite the contrary. When he was sure that his father was awake, he snuggled up against the vampire.

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Lindsey really needed to find out why the hell Eliot and Angel seemed to be so close and what the hell was going on here. He tried to sit up, but pain shot through his back and he carefully laid back down so he wouldn't hurt his back anymore.

Angel and Eliot immediately reached out to see if he was okay and Angel, who actually looked concerned, put a gentle hand on Lindsey's shoulder and told him: "Keep lying down, Lindsey. You need to heal or there might be lasting damage."

Lindsey stared at the vampire and just now he realized that he was unable to move his right arm and he paled even more, but he didn't dare to say anything. Angel had obviously seen the panic and he tried to assure: "Dr. Sanders, Wesley and Lorne are sure that it's going to be temporary and that your arm will heal with time."

Lindsey snorted, but again he didn't say anything, trying to come to terms with what Angel had just told him. He looked at his right arm that was lying useless by his side and only Eliot's presence stopped him from freaking out completely. He stared at his hand, trying to get it to move, but nothing happened.

"What else are you not telling me?" he asked, his voice raspy from not having talked for so long and also from desperately trying to hold back his tears. Seconds later a glass of water was held against his lips, wherever it had come from and he smiled gratefully at his son, who held it in his small hands, looking at his father with concern, but also trying to be brave for Lindsey.

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Angel looked at the young lawyer and hesitated a little, before he finally explained: "You should rest, since you've been out of it for four days."

Lindsey's eyes widened again and he stared at the master vampire.

"Four days?" he rasped, even though it got easier to talk with everything he said. Angel cleared his throat and stood up, helped Eliot sit on the bed beside his father and ran a hand through his hair.

"I'll go and get Wes and Lorne so that they can take a look at you and maybe Dr. Sanders, if they think that's neccessary," he explained and was out of the room before Lindsey could say a word.

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After the door had closed behind the souled vampire and father and son were alone, Eliot again wrapped his arms around his father and hugged him as tightly as he dared without hurting him. Lindsey immediately put his left arm around his son, trying not to think about his numb right arm. He also ignored the pain he was in to comfort his son. The young lawyer didn't even want to think about how lost Eliot must have felt these past days with people he only knew from Lindsey's stories whenever Wolfram and Hart had allowed him to see his son, also worrying if his father was going to wake up.

Eliot needed reassurance and Lindsey was fully prepared to give it to his son, no matter that he himself felt like shit and wished that he'd still be asleep.

"Oh daddy, I was so worried about you when you wouldn't wake up," Eliot whispered, sobbing against his father's shoulder, now that he was alone with him.

"Shh, it's going to be okay, Eli," Lindsey whispered, trying to soothe his distraught son.

"I'll be okay and as soon as I can get out of this bed, we'll get out of this city, buy a nice ranch and you'll finally get that horse you always wanted," he explained, a slight smile on his face, before he added:"Just you and me, like it used to be before I got us into this mess. And we're finally going to be free again."

He ran a gentle hand through his son's hair that was surprisingly looking like it had been combed and not sticking in all directions like it normally did. All in all, Lindsey noticed that Eliot looked like Angel's team had taken good care of him and Lindsey was grateful for that.

_/It's probably been Lorne who has taken care of Lindsey. He's been smitten with Eliot ever since he met him when he was still a toddler and when I came to this cursed city./_ Lindsey mused and he was already thinking about a way how to thank the demon.

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Eliot's next words, however, were more than a surprise to Lindsey. The little boy, who should have been squealing with joy, because he had always wanted to live on a ranch and have his own horse, something he had in common with his father, only shook his head vehemently.

"Why do you wanna leave daddy? I don't wanna leave anymore. I wanna stay here with Angel. We could be a family," he said, looking at his father with wide, innocent blue eyes, but Lindsey could also see the fear in his son's eyes, as if he had been afraid to tell his father about what he wanted.

Especially when Eliot saw the disbelieving and almost hurt look in Lindsey's eyes, he threw his arms around his father again.

"Please don't be mad at me, daddy," he pleaded, again sobbing a little, obviously thinking that his words had hurt his father.

"I'm not mad, buddy," Lindsey quickly assured, wishing that he could pull his son into a secure embrace, but his right arm made that impossible. So he pulled Eliot as close as he could with his left arm and kissed his son's forehead.

"How could you think I was mad? I'll never be mad at you for telling me what you want, Eli. You're the most important person in the whole world to me and I want you to be happy," he said softly, because he really didn't want his son to think that he had disappointed him or that his opinions and wishes didn't matter just because he was a child. He knew from experience how much it hurt when the people who should care about you the most, just ignored you and your wishes and he never wanted his son to feel like he had felt as a child ever.

"I'm not mad, Eli," he repeated and he added, when his son looked at him, a doubtful look on his face: "I was just a little surprised that Angel will let us stay. You know what has happened between us before."

Lindsey had told his son all about Angel and what had happened between them, well, without the bloody details, because he would never hide something that important from his son.

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Eliot was about to say something, when suddenly another voice joined the conversation: "I think we should discuss this later, Eliot, as soon as your father feels better."

Angel had come back a little while ago and had caught part of the conversation, was now looking at father and son with mixed feelings.

In the last four days Eliot had somehow managed to worm his way into the vampire's heart more than he should have been able to and Angel somehow didn't really mind. His eyes traveled to Lindsey. The master vampire still wasn't sure what to feel about the young lawyer.

Ever since Eliot had told him that Lindsey seemed to be in love with him, he had wanted to find out if that was really the truth... and he had also wondered what he would do about it, if it was indeed true.

But then the demon had attacked Lindsey and for about two days they hadn't even been sure if Lindsey would survive.

And when Angel had seen that demon hurt Lindsey, a fury unlike anything he had ever felt, had washed through him and he had literally ripped the demon to pieces.

That had told Angel that he really needed to reexamine what he felt for the young lawyer. But he also didn't really want to find out why, because if he did think about it too much, he would most likely open Pandora's box so to speak and make things much too complicated.

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Angel was shaken out of his thoughts by Eliot asking: "Please tell daddy that you want us to stay." The boy looked at Angel with the same pleading blue eyes that he had had directed at his father just moments before.

The vampire sighed and walked over to the bed, put a hand on the boy's head and smiled gently.

"Eliot, I think we should talk about that later. Right now, Wesley and Lorne need to take a look at your dad so that he will get better. And Cordelia is down in the kitchen baking cookies and she could really need your help."

Angel thought it was better for Eliot to be out of the room and not only because that would give Angel some time to think about what to tell Lindsey and the boy about if the could stay or not. No, he also really didn't want Eliot to see the nasty wound on Lindsey's back, because the kid was still traumatized enough after the demon's attack on his father. And the vampire also wanted to talk to Lindsey without his son present. So he was relieved, and by the look in Lindsey's face he was too, when Eliot's face lit up with a smile.

"Yay, cookies," he said and was about to climb out of the bed when he suddenly remembered why he had barely left this room in the last four days and he looked at his father again, who still looked pale and sick. Eliot then was reluctant to leave and grabbed his father's left hand tightly unsure what would happen if he left.

But for once Lindsey agreed with Angel that Eliot didn't need to be present when Wesley and Lorne, who stood in the doorway a little awkwardly, examined him and he also didn't need to hear what they would talk about in the next minutes. He squeezed his son's hand gently.

"It's okay, buddy. I'll be right here when you get back. And Lorne, Wesley and Angel will take good care of me, they have done so the last days after all," he assured. Eliot looked a little doubtful, but when his father smiled at him, he returned the smile, hugged his dad carefully and whispered: "I love you, daddy."

"I love you too, Eli and I'm so proud of you," Lindsey answered and kissed his son's head gently. Eliot smiled proudly, jumped off the bed and was out of the room only seconds later.

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Angel listened until he couldn't hear Eliot's footsteps on the stairs anymore and then turned towards Lindsey again, only looking at the young lawyer, not sure what to do and what to say now. Lindsey returned the look, equally at a loss what to say.

It was Lorne, who broke the tense silence. The demon walked over to the bed and smiled brightly at Lindsey: "It's so good to see those blue eyes open again, sugar."

Lindsey could see the honest delight in Lorne's face and he forced himself to smile at the demon.

"Thanks Lorne. Also thanks to you and Wesley for patching me up," he said, knowing that the two had probably cared for him until the doctor Angel had mentioned earlier, had gotten here and took care of him.

The demon only smiled and put a hand gently on Lindsey's shoulder, squeezing gently.

"It was nothing, sugar. And Angel was the one to take care of you and Eliot anyway. We merely helped when he let us," he said with a twinkle in his eyes and Lindsey's eyes widened, before he looked at the vampire, who scratched the back of his head and shrugged.

"Someone had to," he explained as if it was nothing, but for Lindsey it made things even more complicated and the feelings welling up inside him also let him forget about his injuries, but not for long, because now Wesley cleared his throat.

"We should probably check the wound and your arm, Lindsey," he explained and also walked closer to the bed.

Lindsey could see that he was much more reluctant than Lorne and even Angel were and he wondered why. The former watcher had always been indifferent to him, so that he seemed to be anywhere but here right now was a little confusing for the young lawyer, but right now he had other things to worry about. So he nodded slowly and let Lorne and Wesley do their job.

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About ten minutes later he was lying as comfortable on his back again as it was possible, propped up on a few pillows so that he was in more of a sitting position, a clean bandage around his torso and his injured arm in a sling so it wouldn't feel as awkward as it had before. Lorne had assured him that it probably was only a matter of time until the muscles and nerves had healed and he'd be able to use the arm again. But Lindsey had also heard the little doubt in the demon's voice and he knew that there was a chance that he might never regain feeling in his right arm.

But Lindsey tried to keep that possibility out of his mind for now, because he could freak out about that later. Right now other things were a little bit more important, especially his son, who, as Angel had assured him, had fun baking cookies with Cordelia, who, also Angel's information, adored the boy. Lindsey had to smile at that thought, but he knew that his son was able to wrap people around his finger without even meaning to.

"Could I maybe have something to eat?" Lindsey questioned, looking at Lorne, who was still in the room with him and Angel. Wesley had left as soon as they had finished examining him, officially to call Dr. Sanders, so that he would come over later and also take a look at Lindsey, but the lawyer had immediately realized that Wesley was glad to be as far away from him as possible.

Lorne looked between Angel and Lindsey and then he nodded.

"Of course, sugar. I'll get you something," he assured, knowing that Lindsey would be hungry now.

"Something light, Lorne," Angel reminded the demon and Lorne nodded, giving Lindsey another smile, before he walked towards the door.

Just before he closed it behind him, he told Angel: "And you take good care of him, Angel-cakes. And remember what we've talked about."

.

With that the demon was gone and Angel and Lindsey were alone. And suddenly the weird tension was back. It was always there when Angel and Lindsey had been alone with each other and they had never been able to figure out why it was there or what to do against it.

Lindsey tried to sit up a little straighter, but he winced when his back started hurting again. Angel was immediately by the young lawyer's side, looking at him in concern.

"Are you okay? Can I help you?" he questioned and his offer was so sincere that Lindsey nodded slowly.

"Could you maybe move the pillows a little?"

Angel did so without hesitation and fluffed up the pillows.

"Better?" he questioned, when he was done, suddenly realizing how close he was to Lindsey. Their faces were only inches apart and Lindsey looked at him with those wide, blue eyes... those eyes that Angel had so often dreamed about, even though he had never allowed himself to think about why.

Had Lindsey's lips always looked this kissable?

And before the vampire knew what he was doing, he closed the remaining distance between them and pressed his lips to Lindsey's...

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to be continued, if you're still interested...

And please, if you haven't, read my question at the beginning of the chapter, because I'd really like your opinion about it...


	4. Chapter 4

**A/N:** Hey everybody *waves* here comes a new chapter finally and I really, really hope you will like it, hopefully more than you seemed to like the new chapters of my other stories *sheepish smile*

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**IMPORTANT: PLEASE READ:** And well, I've come to a decision regarding this story: It's going to be **MPREG in the future chapters**, so if this is not your cup of tea, then here is your warning and you unfortunately need to stop reading. I'll be sad if I lose some of you as readers, but I can also understand that this is not everyone's cup of tea... so yeah, I just wanted to warn you *smiles* **Maybe I'll make alternate chapters, some with MPreg and some without it, but that also depends on your reactions, because if all of you really do not want me to turn this into Mpreg I can co with another storyline, which I will probably write down anyway, hence the two versions idea *smiles***

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Please keep in mind that English is not my native language...

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Of course thank you to **STARS-NEMESIS, dr3, McCoy's Secret Lover, SlytherinQueen020, msdarque, alaine1910, darkshadowarchfiend, Kittendragon, Jesco123, Zak saturday 1, fro-chan, guest and TerrorInYerBathtub** for all your kind words *hugs you all* They really mean a lot to me *smiles brightly*

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**Warnings: AU, SLASH** (Lindsey/?, Lindsey/Angel somewhere along the way) **MPREG**

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**Disclaimer:** The characters from Angel belong to Joss Whedon and I'm just borrowing them for my little story. This is not for money, but just for fun...

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><p><strong>Chapter 4<strong>

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><p>.<p>

Time seemed to stand still for a few seconds when suddenly Lindsey felt Angel's lips on his own and he responded without hesitation, because that was something he had been dreaming about for quite a while now. But then suddenly his conscience kicked back in and the young lawyer broke the kiss, pushing the vampire away with his good arm.

Lindsey stared at Angel, not sure if the vampire was trying to mess with him or if he'd simply finally lost his mind.

"What the hell?" he questioned, not even bothering to hide his shock and confusion. Ever since he'd woken up things had gotten stranger and stranger with everything he learned. First he had found out that Angel had not only saved his life but that he had also taken care of him and his son. And then Eliot had told him that he wanted to stay with Angel and now to top it all off, the vampire had kissed him. So Lindsey thought that he had every right to be confused.

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Not that the kiss had been unpleasant or anything like that, quite the contrary actually. And he had wanted to be kissed by Angel for quite some time now and his heart was still doing happy somersaults, but his brain told him that this was all wrong and that Angel normally hated him. The master vampire still looked at him in a way he had never done before and that look gave Lindsey goosebumps all over his body, not that he'd admit that out loud anytime soon.

Nonetheless he remained silent, waiting for Angel to say something, because the ball was in the vampire's court now. And Angel actually continued to speak.

"Lindsey, I've been so stupid and blind," he started and Lindsey couldn't help and snort at that.

"I'm not going to argue with you on that, Angel," he replied and was surprisingly rewarded with an amused smile from the master vampire, which did funny things to his insides. And to hide his embarrassment and his body's reaction to Angel's smile, the young lawyer questioned: "And what exactly have you been stupid about."

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Angel ran a hand through his short hair, but he didn't answer.

And so Lindsey decided to just voice his opinion why Angel thought he'd been so stupid.

"Let me guess, you think it was stupid to kiss me just now and it was just because you didn't think straight for a second and let your hero-complex guide you for a moment. And you think it's better if Eliot and I leave the city as soon as possible so you won't have to worry about us anymore." There was a bitterness in his voice and before he could really get a grip on his emotions, he let out all of the hurt he felt because of the way Angel had treated him over the last years.

"You want us to leave and you just don't care that I'll be the one who has to explain this to my son, who will be devastated, because he has become attached to you and will once again be tossed aside by someone he has started to trust, just like his father has always been cast aside because nobody was willing to listen to him or believe in him."

Lindsey hadn't even meant to say the last part, but he somehow felt better now that he had said it, now that all the bitterness he had carried because of Angel's treatment of him had found a way out. All the resentment he had carried because of all the failed attempts to convince Angel that he wasn't a bad person and wanted out of Wolfram & Hart, only to be cruelly mocked and tossed aside by Angel and his crew, and all the hurt that had come from years of fighting his feelings for the master vampire, no matter how he had treated him.

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Angel stared at the young lawyer for a second and Lindsey half expected Angel to give an angry speech to defend his actions. But instead he only sighed regretfully and even a little sadly.

"Is that really what you thought I was going to say after what has just happened?" he asked. Lindsey shrugged and then winced in pain when the movement aggravated the wound on his back.

"How was I supposed to think anything else? Every time I tried to get you to see the real me, you pushed me away," he informed and didn't dare to look at the vampire when he said that.

"And that sure as hell didn't change just because I spent a few days in a sort-of-coma," he added a little hesitantly, not sure how Angel would react to those words. But his head snapped up at the vampire's next words.

"And that's exactly what I've been stupid about all this time and why Lorne nearly killed, or at least severely injured me when he learned the truth behind my behavior towards you and scolded me for not coming to him sooner to sort this out. Apparently Lorne cares a great deal about you and about Eliot, maybe even more than he cares about me," Angel explained and if he was still able to really blush, he probably would have blushed like crazy.

Again Lindsey only snorted, a little surprised that Angel hadn't figured that out a lot sooner that Lindsey and Lorne were close, especially when one considered how much time the vampire and his team spent at Lorne's bar. But then again, Lindsey had made a point at hiding in the backroom when Angel was there.

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Nonetheless he muttered: "There's a reason Lorne is named Eliot's godfather."

At the young lawyer's words Angel's eyes widened because that was something else he hadn't known about Lindsey and with every new thing he learned about the younger man, he regretted that deeply. But he tried not to show his surprise at that, because he needed to tell Lindsey how he felt without getting off track with questions he could get answers to later. And he hoped that Lindsey would believe him. To achieve that, Angel had decided and knew that honesty was the best policy here.

"Lindsey, I know that what I'm going to tell you is going to sound unbelievable to you, but I swear that it's the truth. And I really should have told you all this a lot sooner," he began, nervously running a hand through his hair. Lindsey raised an eyebrow and wondered what he was going to hear from Angel now. But he nodded silently, waiting for Angel to continue. And the vampire did only seconds later.

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"When I saw that demon attack and hurt you, I thought my heart would stop... well if my heart were still beating that is. I felt so much fury that I literally tore that demon apart limb from limb," he explained and Lindsey raised his eyebrow, not sure if he should believe it or not. But Lorne had told Lindsey too that Angel had reacted violently when the demon had attacked him, so he decided to give the master vampire the benefit of the doubt and reserve judgment until the vampire had finished his story.

"And that feeling scared the hell out of me, because for a moment I feared that Angelus might come to the surface, no matter that it's impossible for that to happen, now that my soul is permanently attached."

Lindsey gaped at the vampire. He had not known that Angel's soul was permanent now and that meant that Wolfram and Hart didn't know either. And the young lawyer was also shocked that Angel had just admitted that in front of him.

_/Does that mean that he believes I don't want to go back to the firm?/_ Lindsey wondered and hope sparked in his heart, but he quickly tried to push that hope down immediately, because he had learned the hard way that whenever he hoped for something it was almost always taken away from him. The only exception to that was Eliot and even his son had been kept away from him by Wolfram and Hart, so that he'd do their dirty work and whatever else extra activities they required from him. So he was sure that Angel would dash any hopes he might have very quickly.

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Angel had obviously expected Lindsey to say something to his little revelation, but when Lindsey only stared at him, he continued: "Well and when that happened, so many memories assaulted me and I couldn't really make sense of them, didn't even really remember that I had them. And so I talked to Lorne and sang for him, hoping that he could help me figure this out."

The vampire ended and started pacing the room like a caged lion and Lindsey watched his movements carefully before asking: "And, was Lorne able to help you?"

The young lawyer was curious now and wondering what kind of memories that were and why they seemed so important to Angel and he also wondered what that would mean for their relationship in the future, no matter what kind of relationship it was. Angel sighed again and then he nodded slowly.

"Yeah, he helped me to see what an asshole I've been when it comes to you," the vampire admitted and then stopped when Lindsey snorted.

"I never thought I'd hear you say that and once again, I'm not going to argue with you about that."

Angel chuckled darkly.

"To be fair, you weren't exactly a saint either," he couldn't help but say, because Lindsey had done a lot of things that were pretty bad. The younger man nodded.

"Yeah, I know that I did some not so nice to very bad things, but I didn't have much of a choice, because of Eliot and what Wolfram and Hart would have done to him if I hadn't obeyed. What's your excuse?" he questioned, trying not to sound too arrogant, because he knew that the blackmailing didn't make everything he had done right all of sudden, because he had hurt other people no matter what his reasons had been.

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Angel meanwhile again had that look in his eyes that Lindsey couldn't identify and the vampire's shoulders slumped a little-

"The funny thing is that I have an excuse, even though it's not really a good one," the master vampire admitted and Lindsey raised both his eyebrows this time.

"Maybe you should let me be the judge of that since it concern me," he informed, but he really wasn't prepared for what Angel said next.

"I pushed you away because I love you."

The words stunned Lindsey into silence and a wave of emotions washed through the young lawyer: anger, hatred, disappointment and even something like hope. But the anger finally won out.

"So you're saying that you have made my life hell, put me down and mocked me every chance you got and never believed me when I told you that I wanted out because you loved me?" he questioned, shaking his head in disbelief, before he continued: "And now you just expect me to fall into your arms and forgive you for everything? And you even dragged my son into this as a bargaining chip?"

That last part had come out entirely involuntarily, because no matter what Lindsey thought about Angel, he knew that the vampire would never use an innocent child for his own devices.

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But after that revelation Angel had just made, Lindsey thought he deserved to lash out at the vampire. And he felt a little satisfied to see the hurt look in Angel's eyes. He had fully expected the other to get angry at him and so he was surprised when Angel just sighed.

"Well, again you're partly right. I really tried to get to know Eliot over the last few days, but not because I wanted to use him against you in any way. First of all, I really wanted to distract him, because he was worried to death about you, just like I was and talking to him helped me and talking to me helped him. And second I really wanted Eliot to like me, because he's a bright kid and I happen to be in love with his father," the vampire admitted and Lindsey shook his head wildly.

"Stop saying that," he pleaded, hating that he suddenly had tears in his eyes.

"What? That I love you?" Angel asked, coming closer to the bed and sitting down on the bed, which made Lindsey scoot away a little, wincing when once again the wound on his back hurt.

"Yes, please don't say that anymore," Lindsey repeated, staring at the vampire with wide eyes, especially when Angel shook his head.

"I won't stop saying it, Lindsey," he said, reaching out to run a gentle hand over the other man's cheek, a little smile on his lips when Lindsey didn't flinch away from him.

"Because it's the truth and I'll say it as often as you need to hear it to believe me and even when you believe me I won't stop saying it, Lindsey. I just want you to give me a chance to make it up to you."

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"I'm not sure if I can do that, Angel."

Lindsey once again shook his head wildly, this time a tear running down his cheek. He really wanted to believe Angel, but he just couldn't, not after everything that had happened between the two and not in the current situation he was in. But he also couldn't help the hope bubbling inside him that maybe, just maybe he might have a future with the vampire. And since he had no idea what to say to Angel now, he just kept silent, trying to process his own feelings.

"I can be patient, Lindsey and I didn't expect you to forgive me all at once. Take all the time you need and just know that I'm here, waiting for your decision."

Angel smiled down at him and before Lindsey knew what was happening, the vampire bent down and kissed him again, gently, almost lovingly and Lindsey once again found himself melting into the kiss, his heart going a mile a minute. When they broke the kiss, Lindsey was slightly out of breath and Angel's hand still rested on his cheek. The vampire obviously wasn't willing to lose body contact with Lindsey.

But he also had a guilty look on his face that made Lindsey wary again immediately.

"What is it you're not telling me, Angel?" he questioned, gulping nervously, especially when Angel looked even more guilty.

"Lindsey, there's something else I need to tell you, something you might not believe, but I swear that it's the truth," Angel started and when Lindsey only looked at him with wide eyes, he hesitated for a second, before he whispered quietly: "It's something about Eliot... about me and Eliot to be exact..."

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to be continued...

**Please read the A/N, it's important...**


	5. Chapter 5

**A/N:** Hey everybody, here comes a new chapter and I really hope you will like it, especially with the little twist and now that I'm going with the **Mpreg-storyline.**.. yeah, I really hope you will still bear with me.

I will probably write the non-MPreg-storyline too once I've finished this one, or maybe parallel to this one... so yeah...

For now just have fun reading and comments would of course be much appreciated *puppy dog eyes*

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Of course thank you to **McCoy's Secret Lover, Jesco123, msdarque, Kittendragon, dr3, darkshadowarchfiend, mikesh, Mori Lina** (I hope you can live with the way the story is going to go, Mpreg and all, because I'd hate to lose you as a reader, but I can totally understand if you can't continue reading it and I'll probably start on the non-Mpreg-storyline soon), **fro-chan, TerrorInYerBathtub and sweetteetwo **for all your kind comments *hugs you all* and thank you also to everybody who has favorited and alerted this story *smiles*

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**Warnings: AU, SLASH** (Lindsey/?, Lindsey/Angel somewhere along the way) **MPREG, but nothing too explicit... mostly just mentioned...**

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**Disclaimer:** The characters from Angel belong to Joss Whedon and I'm just borrowing them for my little story. This is not for money, but just for fun...

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><p><strong>Chapter 5<strong>

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"It's something about Eliot... about me and Eliot to be exact..."

Lindsey stared at Angel, not really sure if he wanted to know what exactly the vampire wanted to tell him, especially when he saw the look on Angel's face. And he also wondered what Angel could have to say about him and Eliot. So he looked at the other warily.

"And what is it that you have to tell me?" he questioned cautiously, again not sure if he really wanted an answer, but at the same time needing one. The hand on his cheek tensed a little, but Angel didn't remove his hand. It was obvious that the vampire was looking for the right words. Angel sighed again and Lindsey stayed quiet, giving the other the time to find the right words, even though his mind screamed at him to just ask Angel... to find out if there was a threat to his son here somewhere. It was quiet for a little longer, before Angel finally found his voice.

"Do you remember our first meeting?" he questioned and Lindsey raised an eyebrow. This really wasn't the question he had expected.

"Seriously?" he questioned, sitting up a little to better see Angel's face. "You are seriously asking me if I remember our first meeting?" he wanted to know, just to make sure that he hadn't misunderstood the other man. Lindsey really wondered why Angel brought this up right now and in this situation.

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Of course Lindsey remembered their first meeting. How could he forget something like that? Angel had thrown Lindsey's client out of the window after all and the young lawyer had found the vampire's boldness somehow very interesting. Still, he had no idea why Angel had brought it up, but the vampire probably had a good reason so Lindsey decided to just humor him for now.

"Of course I remember. I got into a lot of trouble with the Senior Partners because of that," he answered and wisely didn't tell Angel that he had also wanted to just bent over the nearest table and beg Angel to fuck him bag then, because he had been scared by those intensive feelings he had had ever since he had first laid eyes on the vampire. Angel chuckled a little, because he also remembered that moment when he and Lindsey had looked at each other in that huge office. But the chuckle didn't hold long and the master vampire turned serious again seconds later. He looked at Lindsey, really not sure how to exactly say what he needed to tell the young lawyer. But he knew there was no easy way to say it, so he decided to just start and hope that he'd get out all he needed to say.

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"What would you say if I told you that that wasn't our first meeting?" he asked and Lindsey stared at him wide-eyed.

"I'd call you crazy, because how on Earth do you think I could forget meeting you before that?" Lindsey questioned, glad that his voice sounded even and didn't shake too much, because his heart had sped up, beating rapidly. Angel ran a hand through his hair and sighed.

"Not if the Powers that be wanted us to forget it," Angel stated and Lindsey's eyebrow rose even more, especially when Angel said "us", because that meant that somehow the vampire hadn't remembered either. But still, Lindsey wasn't sure if he should just start laughing out loud at the ridiculousness of it all. When he saw the expression on Angel's face, however, he thought that this might not be the best idea.

"You're serious, aren't you? We've really met before and we both don't remember?" he questioned. And when Angel nodded, the young lawyer's eyes widened, the gears in his head started turning, trying to make a connection.

Why had Angel brought that forgotten first meeting up, when he was trying to tell him something about Eliot, and more important about a connection between his son and Angel? Lindsey's heart skipped a beat when he finally made a connection, not necessarily one he liked, or maybe one he really had wished for?

"Angel, what are you trying to say?" Lindsey asked, fear and hope evident in his voice.

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Angel was about to answer him, when suddenly the door to the room burst open and Eliot came through the door, a bright smile on his face, munching on a cookie and waving a clear plastic bag with more in his other hand.

"Look daddy, Cordy gave me cookies for you," he yelled, continuing without taking a breath, or so it seemed: "They're not the ones we made, of course, because Cordy says that they need a little more time in the oven. But she made them yesterday and gave me one, because I was such a good helper today and some for you, because cookies will help you get better sooner."

The little boy said all of that between bites of his own cookie and Lindsey couldn't help but smile at his son's antics and his heart warmed when he saw how happy his son was, even though it was a bit painful to realize that other people made his son this happy. And Lindsey's smile dropped from his face, when instead of climbing onto the bed, snuggling up to him, Eliot simply climbed into Angel's lap as if it was the most natural thing in the world and then he held out the bag of cookies for Lindsey to take.

A burning in his eyes told Lindsey that there were tears forming, but he refused to cry about this, not in front of his son and not in front of Angel of all people. Besides, it was also a little heartwarming to see how content Angel looked, an arm around Eliot to keep him from falling off his lap. But it also hurt, because for the past years it had always been Lindsey and Eliot and it was a little sad to see that Eliot trusted those people so much already. He feared that it might just end up a situation that would hurt his son and Lindsey really didn't want that.

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He watched Angel and Lindsey and there really was that content look on Angel's face that Lindsey had never seen before and again his brain made a connection Lindsey didn't really want to make, but at the same time it would be almost like a dream come true. He wanted to ask Angel more about their supposed first meeting before their actual first meeting, but with Eliot in the room and his suspicions about what Angel had wanted to tell him, he really didn't want to ask.

To avoid further awkwardness and to stop his thoughts from going even darker and getting more confusing, Lindsey reached out with his good arm and took the bag of cookies that Eliot still held towards him.

"Thanks, buddy," he said and would have loved to ruffle his son's hair, but with his other arm useless he couldn't do it, but he tried to hide the frustration because of it and continued with a light smile: "I'm sure I'll feel a lot of better after a few cookies and when I taste the ones you made, it will get much better." After he had said that, he tried to open the plastic bag.

Eliot beamed at him and snuggled a little closer to Angel, who put his arm more securely around the small boy's chest, a small smile on his face, which quickly turned into a frown when he saw the dark look on the young lawyer's face, Lindsey was still trying to get the bag open, but with one hand it was obviously too hard for him to do.

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And without thinking too much, Angel reached out.

"Here, let me help you," he said and wanted to take the cookies from Lindsey, who looked at him, his face a frustrated mask and for a moment the vampire thought that he might start yelling at him, telling him that he didn't need his help, but then Lindsey only sighed in resignation and handed Angel the bag.

"Thanks," he whispered, avoiding Angel's eyes. The vampire sighed when he took the bag, wondering why Lindsey seemed so distant all of sudden. But then again, the two of them had a lot to talk about. Especially about Eliot. Angel's eyes wandered to the blonde boy on his lap, who was still munching on a cookie. A fond smile made its way onto his face again, something he had happen to him quite often for the last days whenever Eliot paid him attention.

Quickly shaking his head to stop his thoughts from wandering, Angel opened the zipper on the clear plastic bag, took out a cookie and handed it to Lindsey.

"Thanks," was the short answer from the young lawyer, who then busied himself with eating said cookie.

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Eliot, who had been quiet on Angel's lap so far, now squirmed a little, so that Angel loosened his grip on the boy. Eliot didn't waist any time to climb out of Angel's lap and onto the bed, snuggling up to his father. He had obviously realized that his father was upset about something and he wanted him to feel better.

"Daddy, can I sleep with you tonight?" he questioned, his eyes wide, because he really didn't want to leave, not now that his father was finally awake.

Lindsey, who couldn't help the warmth spread through him when his son came to him and he nodded without hesitation.

"Of course you can, Eli. In fact, I'll probably feel a lot better when you're here with me and protect me," he stated, his voice as serious as possible, stifling a chuckle when Eliot squared his shoulders and tried to look more intimidating.

"Of course I'll protect you, daddy, just like you have always protected me," Eliot answered, proud that his father trusted him so much. Lindsey put his arm, now that he had finished eating the cookie, around his son and pulled him closer, inhaling his boy's scent, just to assure himself that he was still here with him... or better that he was finally back with him. And his mood had brightened up again too, now that his son didn't favor Angel.

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Angel...

The thought of the vampire brought Lindsey back to the other occupant of the room and he looked at the souled vampire, slightly taken aback at the intense look on Angel's face. The vampire's eyes were so focused on them that Lindsey had the feeling that it took all of Angel's willpower to not just climb into bed with them and pull them into his arms. And Lindsey couldn't help but imagine what it would feel like. The image his mind came up with, wasn't a really unpleasant one and it also helped Lindsey to remember that Angel had to tell him something important about Eliot and the young lawyer finally wanted to know what it was. And as much as he hated the thought to be parted from his son again, he knew that Eliot didn't necessarily have to hear what Angel thought was so significant and important. He ruffled his son's hair and looked at him.

"Eli, can you find Lorne for me? I really need to talk to him about something important?" he questioned, sure that the demon was still somewhere in the hotel and Eliot wouldn't be tempted to go outside.

His son looked a little dubious, probably not willing to leave his father again, but what Lindsey had just asked of him sounded important and Eliot adored Lorne and loved spending time with his godfather, so looking for him and then have three of his four favorite adults in one room to play with him and to talk to was a very nice prospect, so he nodded, snuggled closer to his father again for a second, before smiling brightly.

"I will," he promised, gave Angel another smile, slid down the bed and then he was gone as abruptly as he had stormed into the room minutes earlier. And again Lindsey had to smile. It was so good to see Eliot back to his happy self that he had been before Wolfram & Hart had interfered with the boy's life.

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But as soon as Eliot was out of the room, the door closed with a loud bang after him, Lindsey turned his attention towards Angel, giving the vampire a pointed look. And Angel understood it without too much problems.

"You want to finish this talk now?" he questioned and inched a little closer to the bed. Lindsey nodded immediately.

"Yes, I do want to finish it now. I'm so worried and freaked out just thinking what you might want to tell me and I have a few suspicions so please confirm or dismiss them right now before I go crazy," the young lawyer stated, sitting up a little more so that he could look Angel straight in the eye to see if the vampire was lying to him or not about whatever he was going to say next.

Angel sighed and ran a hand through his hair.

"As I said before, what I'm going to tell now, is going to sound unbelievable, but it's the truth and it is a truth I couldn't be more happy about," he started and Lindsey's eyes widened a little, because if it really was, what he suspected and Angel was happy about it too, then maybe there really was hope. And even though Lindsey had tried to prepare himself for this possibility, he was still stunned into silence, when Angel finally told him, a bright smile on his face.

"I'm Eliot's second father..."

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to be continued...

So, did you like the little twist? *ducks flying tomatoes*


	6. Chapter 6

**A/N: **Wow, I really didn't intend for it to be a year until I updated this, but things happened and I didn't find the energy to update this. I even should be resting now, but somehow I'm restless and I finally decided to finish the newest chapter and post it.

I really hope some of you still want to read how this goes *smiles hopefully*

Comments would of course be most appreciated *puppy dog eyes*

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Thank you to **Jesco123, McCoy's Secret Lover, sweetteetwo, Mori Lina, msdarque, mikesh, fro-chan, Quiet Ryter, BetahimeTsukiko and Mr July** for all your kind comments *hugs you all*

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**Warnings: AU, SLASH** (Lindsey/?, Lindsey/Angel somewhere along the way) **MPREG, but nothing too explicit... mostly just mentioned... and OOCness in some chapters...**

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**Disclaimer:** The characters from Angel belong to Joss Whedon and I'm just borrowing them for my little story. This is not for money, but just for fun...

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><p><strong>Chapter 6<strong>

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><p>.<p>

"I'm Eliot's second father..."

The words felt like a gunshot in the suddenly completely silent room and Lindsey could do nothing else but stare at the souled vampire, sure that he'd wake up any second from this weird dream

"What?" he finally managed to get out, not sure if Angel was playing a rather cruel joke on him just to get back at him for all the things he had done to Angel and his friends, but one look into the other man's eyes told Lindsey, that yes, Angel was dead serious and being a vampire dead serious actually meant something.

The master vampire had a small smile on his face now and took Lindsey's uninjured hand into both of his own

"It's true, Linds, I know that it is a little hard to believe, but Lorne told me what he saw and why would Lorne of all people, who clearly loves and adores you and Eliot, lie to me about this?" he questioned, almost desperate for the young lawyer to believe him.

Lindsey maybe would have been able to name a few reasons, but he was busy hiding the pleased flush that had run through him when Angel had used a nickname for him. And he also knew, that no, Lorne would never lie to anyone about something like this. He cared about Eliot too much to him get hurt because of a lie the demon had told.

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"But how?" Lindsey asked, voice small. Yes, he believed that Angel was telling the truth, but he still had no idea how it was possible for it to be true in the first place. And Lindsey still hadn't rediscovered his ability to from longer and more coherent sentences, but honestly, those two words got across perfectly what he wanted Angel to tell him. The vampire sighed and ran a hand through his hair, before he winced a little at the movement. Sitting in that hard plastic chair for a few days had taken its toll on the vampire too and made him ache with certain movements. Lindsey, who had always been very aware of Angel's reactions, of course noticed that and carefully slid a little to the side on the huge bed.

"Make yourself comfortable Angel. I think this talk may take a while and the least I can do after everything you've done for me, is to offer to let you stretch out on this bed with me," he invited, not sure why he had just done that. But he didn't take back those words, he simply stared at the vampire expectantly. The bed was big enough for the both of them to stretch out on without actually having to touch each other. Angel looked at Lindsey in surprise, but he really wasn't a strong enough person right now to resist that inviting offer. So he quickly stretched out on the bed on the spot Lindsey had made available. And before he really consciously knew what he was doing, he had pulled Lindsey into his arms.

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At first Lindsey's whole body tensed and Angel was convinced that the younger man would pull away, but then Lindsey relaxed and allowed his body to snuggle close to the vampire, both marveling at how good and natural it felt, not that they'd admit that out loud soon, both for different reasons.

"So. How exactly can you be Eliot's father? I mean, I know it was a one-night-stand, but I'd like to think that I'd remember if it had been you. You're pretty memorable after all," Lindsey told Angel and the vampire smiled at the backhanded compliment. Again on instinct he pulled the human even closer against his chest, enjoying the warmth that Lindsey was giving off and he couldn't help but realize how right it felt to lay here with Lindsey like that. And yes, he would have felt completely content right now, if he didn't have to tell Lindsey how the Powers that Be had screwed with the two of them for reasons even Lorne hadn't any real idea about.

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"I couldn't remember either, Lindsey," he assured, well he hoped it was assuring in some way.

"But I really wish I would have realized it sooner, because then I could have been there for you and our son," he murmured through clenched teeth, obviously angry that he had missed so much and angry at what had been done to the two of them. Lindsey only stared at the vampire, too tired and drained to actually have enough energy to be angry. He simply stared at the vampire, not sure what to say now, let alone what to really feel.

_/Our son/_ he mused, amazed how good that sounded. But he still wasn't ready to just forgive Angel for everything that had happened between the two of them. He had tried to tell Angel more than once that he wanted out and the vampire had always ignored him and Lindsey had let his anger at the rejection and his worry for Eliot cloud his judgment and actions too. So they had a lot of work to do and a lot of issues to work through, but right now it seemed like Angel wanted this to really work out between them, so Lindsey took that as a good sign and a step in the right direction. But then again, Lindsey couldn't help but wonder if Angel was only pretending to want this because of Eliot? Because they suddenly had a son together and Lindsey still didn't know how that was even possible.

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And he simply couldn't silence that tiny voice in his head that told him that Angel really only wanted this, because of Eliot. The young lawyer, however, forced that little voice to shut up for now, so that he could finally find out how Angel could be Eliot's father and everything the vampire knew about the plans of the Powers that Be and how they involved his son. All the insecurities and fears came back, even though he tried not to show it. He looked at Angel, unsure what was going to happen next and he also wondered now, why exactly he had invited Angel to lay down with him in the first place, but he felt strangely comforted in Angel's arms. To get back on topic, he finally repeated his earlier question.

"So, how come that I have no idea that you're Eliot's other father, because again, I think I'd remember if we'd ever had sex, let alone if you had got me pregnant," he wanted to know. Angel sighed deeply and tightened his hold on Lindsey some more, as if he was afraid that the younger man would vanish any second, but Lindsey thought it better not to comment on it.

"As I said, the Powers that Be messed with us. Apparently we weren't allowed to fall in love too soon, if at all, so they realized they needed to stop this before it even started, after I had got you pregnant, which was needed obviously. So they messed with our memory," Angel explained to the best of his ability, because he himself didn't understand everything yet. He started to softly caress Lindsey's shoulder without even realizing it. And the younger man didn't protest, because it felt good and helped him to not freak out completely. But that also explained why, no matter how hard he had tried, he hadn't been able to ever recall the face of that man that had taken him to bed that night so long ago.

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Lindsey felt lost and confused and he really wasn't used to feeling like this, or hadn't been for a long time, actually not since the day he had found out that he was pregnant. And part of him hated to feel so helpless again and in need of protection, but another part of him loved, that for once, he didn't have to be the strong one and could let other people take care of him, no matter if it was his once worst enemy who did the actual caring. Sure, it shouldn't surprise him that Angel cared about him, not after everything he had told him. But it was still a little hard to accept no matter that Angel looked honestly distraught that the Powers that Be had taken his son from him. Lindsey still didn't dare to hope that Angel was also regretting that the two of them hadn't been able to find out where that one passionate night between them would have led. It also explained, why he had always had ambiguous feelings towards Angel, ranging from hatred to lust to annoyance and, unfortunately, also to love, no matter how hopeless that sentiment was.

Yes, Angel had told him that he thought he loved him, but Lindsey still couldn't believe him and he was pretty sure that Angel would soon realize that he only loved Lindsey because of his feelings towards Eliot and that Lindsey actually wasn't worth his love.

A tiny part of Lindsey told him, that maybe he should just take what Angel was willing to give him, because lying here with Angel, the vampire's arms wrapped around him almost protectively was one of the best experiences of his life, which was actually a little sad to admit, but then again, Lindsey didn't really care about that right now.

"So the Powers that Be really messed with us for no real reason and didn't want us to find out that we had a child together?" he finally asked.

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Angel nodded, but then he added, voice grim: "Well not for no reason. They wanted you and Eliot vulnerable, so they could control both of you better and so that I wouldn't be there to protect you."

There was anger clearly visible in the vampire's voice, so Lindsey decided that this was not the right time to throw a fit about how he was able to take care of himself and his son, that he had done so for years. Instead he also came to a realization that nearly made his heart stop.

"Does that mean that Eliot is in danger?" he questioned, his heart speeding up again, hammering against his chest.

Angel's face turned grim.

"I fear he is, Lindsey. That's another reason why I want the two of you to stay here. You're save here. I'll protect our son with my life, I promise you that," the vampire told the younger man and pulled Lindsey even closer against him, surprised when Lindsey didn't protest. But the blonde lawyer simply felt relieved. He knew that his son couldn't have better protectors than Angel and his friends, especially after Lindsey was useless with his paralyzed arm. A heavy silence settled over them again, both lost in deep thoughts, trying to come to terms with everything.

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"And where do we stand in all of this?" Lindsey finally asked that question he really dreaded the answer to, insecurity shining in his blue eyes.

Angel sighed again. He knew that it was going to be hard work to convince Lindsey that, no matter what had happened between them in the past and with his feelings as surprising to him as they were to Lindsey, they were genuine.

"Lindsey, every word I told you is true. I love you and I probably always have and I want you and Eliot to be a permanent fixture in my life. I want us to be a real family, no matter how strange that might sound to you right now."

Lindsey really wanted to believe Angel so badly, but the vampire had dealt his heart so many blows that he simply couldn't, not right now at least. But he also knew that the other wouldn't understand that, especially given their current position, snuggled against each other, comfortable as if it had always been like that between them. So he simply nodded, keeping all his doubts and fears to himself.

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Having Angel pretend to like him just so that he and Eliot would stay with the vampire, was more than Lindsey had ever dared to hope fpr and it was better than nothing. Maybe one day he could even forget that Angel was only pretending. Angel of course sensed the change of mood in Lindsey, but he simply couldn't figure out what exactly was bothering the younger man and he simply hoped that Lindsey would tell him on his own when he was ready.

For now he simply kissed Lindsey's forehead, which made the younger man look up at him in surprise, before Lindsey gave him an almost shy smile, which made him look much younger and Angel began to understand that the cocky lawyer MacDonald was only a mask or maybe only one part of the many layers that made up the person that was Lindsey.

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The younger man's voice brought Angel back to the present.

"So are you going to tell Eliot that you're his father?" Lindsey as and Angel looked at him with wide eyes.

"As much as I want him to know, that's not my decision to make, Lindsey. You're the one, who raised him and I respect it if you don't want to tell him now. I just hope that you will tell him one day, when you think that he's ready for it."

Now it was Lindsey's turn to stare at Angel with wide eyes.

"Really?" he questioned, disbelief coloring his voice. Angel gave Lindsey a small, but honest smile.

"Of course," he confirmed.

"I want what's best for our son and you know him better than anyone, no matter how much I want to change that and you know what's best for him, so it's your decision when you tell him. I only hope it won't take too long until you think he's ready, but that's just me being selfish."

Lindsey snorted at Angel's words and then he said, only half serious: "Sometimes I'm not sure if you even have one selfish bone left in your body."

Then he separated from Angel, ignoring the feeling that screamed "wrong" and he looked at the master vampire.

"But seriously, who are you and what have you done to the real Angel, who'd gladly throw me off the tallest building he could find?"  
>Lindsey had no idea how to cope with all these new developments, that had been thrown at him since he had woken up just a few hours ago, no matter that it suddenly seemed a lifetime ago. And Angel being all nice, considerate and gentle towards him was just a little too much, no matter how often Lindsey had dreamed about things being like this between him and the master vampire.<p>

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Angel only continued to watch him.

"I've simply admitted to myself and you what I've known for quite a while now and that is how I really feel," was all he said and Lindsey only snorted again. Sure, Angel had repeated it more than once now, but Lindsey was still unsure and on edge for some reason.

"Angel... I..." he started, but he didn't get much further, because suddenly the door to the room burst open and Eliot dragged a shocked looking Lorne into the room. Before Angel or Lindsey could react to Eliot's sudden return and could say anything, it was the boy himself, who took matters into his own hands.

He let go of Lorne's hand, walked straight over to Angel and looked him directly in the eyes, before he asked: "Are you really my other daddy?"

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to be continued, if you're still interested...

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Well, sorry again that it has been so long and sorry for the OOCness in this chapter, I really hope that it wasn't too bad and you still enjoyed reading it *smiles hopefully*


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